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Prenuptial Agreement

Here's our prenup as it currently stands. Told you it wouldn't change.

  • Steve promises to attend Winter Camp in its entirety as long as God allows him to remain.
  • Kristie promises not to complain when pictures and updates of Winter Camp are posted late.
  • Steve promises not to complain when Kristie brings strange animals into the house, no matter how badly they smell or what their upkeep requirements are.
  • Kristie promises not to complain when Steve brings strange gamers into the house, no matter how badly they smell or what their upkeep requirements are.
  • Steve promises that he will teach the kids how to do stupid things, like ride their bikes in the street and juggle fire.
  • Kristie promises to pick Steve and the kids up from the emergency room.
  • Steve promises to cut up plastic pop bottle holders even if not doing so will kill winged rats (aka seagulls).
  • Kristie promises not to save more plastic bags than she can use in a school year.
  • Steve promises to watch stupid shows that Kristie enjoys, like Boston Public and Dark Angel, or at least to keep his mouth shut while they're on.
  • Kristie promises not to complain when Steve makes her watch stupid movies with bad endings (like Knightriders and certain Buffy episodes).
  • Steve promises he'll always get his own gas.
  • Kristie promises not to go to the train building or Belle Isle alone and to keep her shoes on when she does go.
  • Steve promises not to eat anything that still has its old face and then kiss Kristie.
  • Kristie promises to be careful with cough drops. (nope, we're not going to elaborate, so don't bother asking).
  • Both promise to attend family functions that don't get in the way of the above.
  • Both promise to have kids to teach stupid stuff to, but not right away (we have stupid stuff of our own to learn first).

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